Forget the whales. Save the sheep!

So some young man was caught on video compromising the integrity of a sheep, and former chairman of the Barbados Child Care Board, David "Joey" Harper, describes it as "technology gone wild and morals compromised because of the technology", adding that “the Internet and cellular phones were being used to destroy people.” At the same time, however, he acknowledges that "This is nothing new to our society. Years ago there was a belief that if a boy did not have sex with a duck or a fowl, he was not a real boy. But this shows a breakdown in the community.”

You’re going to need to pick a side, Mr. Harper. Either cell phones are Satan’s little plastic (or metal alloy) fingers causing the modern demise of society by way of sheep violation, or this particular scourge was alive and well long before mobile phones were popular. If the former, then the power to cook an egg (and therefore our brains?) is the least of what we have to fear from these malevolent machines, since they seem to now be imbued with all kinds of soul-corrupting powers.

Joey: a boy who wants to have sex with a sheep is probably going to have sex with a sheep – cell phone or not. Stop blaming technology and figure out why boys are walking around having sex with sheep. And how is this all of a sudden a sign of the Apocalypse when, by your own admission, this is another one of those things that has been happening for generations? But that, like so many other things, we have always just passed off as a Caribbean quirk; in much the same way as we say not “He is an alcoholic” but “Oh he does drink nuff rum”; and not “He is abusive” but “Oh he does beat he wife”. Nothing is a problem and everything is dismissible. Only when there is popular, photographic evidence do the suits come out harrumphing and blaming everything from globalization to El Niño to the Guyanese.

So how would Mr. Harper prefer to have seen this situation handled by those involved? He says, “…he knows that he is being videotaped and it does not bother him. This shows that values are disappearing and that is a problem.” Translation: “Hide! Have sex with poultry and livestock if you must but for the love of Oprah, have the decency to hide! That’s how we did it in my day!”

I’m not saying I have all the answers to what ails, but hiding, shaming and blaming are business as usual, and clearly that business is failing. If we would replace the Puritanism with a decent school sex education programme, perhaps we could have an honest dialogue around all types of sexual behaviour, including but not limited to the underground phenomenon of sheep molestation.