Friday 30 January 2009

Forget the whales. Save the sheep!


So some young man was caught on video compromising the integrity of a sheep, and former chairman of the Barbados Child Care Board, David "Joey" Harper, describes it as "technology gone wild and morals compromised because of the technology", adding that “the Internet and cellular phones were being used to destroy people.” At the same time, however, he acknowledges that "This is nothing new to our society. Years ago there was a belief that if a boy did not have sex with a duck or a fowl, he was not a real boy. But this shows a breakdown in the community.”

You’re going to need to pick a side, Mr. Harper. Either cell phones are Satan’s little plastic (or metal alloy) fingers causing the modern demise of society by way of sheep violation, or this particular scourge was alive and well long before mobile phones were popular. If the former, then the power to cook an egg (and therefore our brains?) is the least of what we have to fear from these malevolent machines, since they seem to now be imbued with all kinds of soul-corrupting powers.

Joey: a boy who wants to have sex with a sheep is probably going to have sex with a sheep – cell phone or not. Stop blaming technology and figure out why boys are walking around having sex with sheep. And how is this all of a sudden a sign of the Apocalypse when, by your own admission, this is another one of those things that has been happening for generations? But that, like so many other things, we have always just passed off as a Caribbean quirk; in much the same way as we say not “He is an alcoholic” but “Oh he does drink nuff rum”; and not “He is abusive” but “Oh he does beat he wife”. Nothing is a problem and everything is dismissible. Only when there is popular, photographic evidence do the suits come out harrumphing and blaming everything from globalization to El Niño to the Guyanese.

So how would Mr. Harper prefer to have seen this situation handled by those involved? He says, “…he knows that he is being videotaped and it does not bother him. This shows that values are disappearing and that is a problem.” Translation: “Hide! Have sex with poultry and livestock if you must but for the love of Oprah, have the decency to hide! That’s how we did it in my day!”

I’m not saying I have all the answers to what ails, but hiding, shaming and blaming are business as usual, and clearly that business is failing. If we would replace the Puritanism with a decent school sex education programme, perhaps we could have an honest dialogue around all types of sexual behaviour, including but not limited to the underground phenomenon of sheep molestation.

5 comments:

  1. Great post, and you beat me to the punch. Nice message to ram home, as they say. Don't accept that we need to be sheepish nor should we let anyone pull the wool over our eyes.

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  2. dang. someone bleat me to it.

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  3. Dialogue about sex with sheep: Encourages disease spread across species (very bad), damaging to sheep, every known case was comitted on someone else's sheep. Common sense dictates it should be illeagal.

    That was a quick dialogue! Glad we got that out of the way and didn't waste our children's time in school with such drivel.

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  4. Bruce, if you think that 'honest dialogue around all types of sexual behaviour' is just about bestiality, then maybe you'd be well served to find yourself back in a classroom and sit it on the dialogue.

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  5. Mongoose, I'm terribly sorry you have to contend with having the issues you highlight boiled ridiculously down to the lowest common denominator but be assured I read you loud and clear. This issue isn't about foopin' sheep. It is about the double standards and 'sweep it under the carpet' culture that we use to excuse a litany of ills. The only 'problem' is that now the rot that has set in is being recorded and put on display (heaven forbid) so that folk like Mr. Harper are in the (clearly uncomfortable) position of having to pick a side. Poor fella!

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